Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize