i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
