I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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