Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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