it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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