why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
