Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i came on her dog
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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