she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
