pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
We need a shit load of segways right now
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
