Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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