No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
