Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I understand Curling. That high.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Randomize
