Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
