I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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