Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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