Joe is yelling at the trees again.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
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