and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
