new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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