office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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