You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
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