Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
