I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
