He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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