do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
