yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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