he was CRYING into my vagina
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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