I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
