Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
