i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i will never coherently bang her
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
