1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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