You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
