Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
