"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
