watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
