well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
