Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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