hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
