Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
