didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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