I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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