I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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