it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
