I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
