are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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