is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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