i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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