Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Randomize
