Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
