dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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