wrigley field is MILF paradise
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
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